Aubrey Plaza. My Dangerous, Awkward Crush.

Actress Aubrey Plaza has had me confused, uncomfortable, and smitten for a long time. 

First it was Parks and Rec. That darkness. That hatred of other humans. It's almost like she's an alien in a human suit. But the alien isn't trying very hard to fit in. And it's a really sexy human suit.

It's almost like Aubrey Plaza is here, AND existing on another plane of existence at the same time. 

She has these big doe eyes that make her look like a simple creature. But when you listen to what she says, she's highly intelligent.

Her flirt game is strong. But you know it's not genuine. 

But you don't care. 

 

It's almost like Aubrey Plaza is powered by your discomfort, like the city in Monsters Inc is powered by screams or laughter.

 

If you worry about her being "not right", relax. She had it checked out.

 

And in Legion, she looks damn dangerous. 

And it's too much. Naw, it's just right.

 

To see her in a live interview is like watching a cobra that hypnotises you. You know you should back away, but you can't.

Look at this collection of Aubrey Plaza encounters. Highlights:

-secret baby teeth in a drawer (at the 1:20 mark)

-awkward confrontation with Howie Mandell (2:31)

-followed her principal home in a box (6:46)

-she destroys Michael Cera in a personal confrontation on a red carpet

 

Hi Aubrey Plaza. Notice me. Or don't.

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