The running joke is that cockroaches live forever. This, of course, is not true...the average life expectancy of an American cockroach is only like a year. But the truth is that cockroaches as a species are pretty sturdy...they can survive a lot of crap that humans can't, including high amounts of radiation, food shortages, etc.
So why WOULDN'T you want to celebrate your eternal love by naming one of nature's proven survivors after bae?
Well, thanks to the Bronx Zoo, you can do just that.
That's right, for a measly 15 bucks, you can name a cockroach after your sweetie!! AND to top it all off, they'll get a certificate to show off to all their friends that got jewelry for Valentine's Day that YOU dared to be different!
Add another sixty bucks and they'll get all sorts of cockroach-themed apparel - a mug, a beanie, and even a roach pin to commemorate your thoughtfulness.
Proceeds benefit the Bronx Zoo and the Wildlife Conservation Society, so you'll be helping a great cause...not just the well-being of cockroaches.
So Happy Valentine's Day to my wife!! May our love be as eternal as the cockroach population.