A handful of CIA contractors were booted from their jobs after an investigation uncovered a large-scale vending machine hack that resulted in the theft of other $3,000 in snacks and drinks over a 6 month period.
Basically, the employees unplugged a cable connected to their electronic "FreedomPay" system and then used unfunded dummy cards to purchase stuff from the machine at no cost.
YOU GONNA TRY TO STEAL FROM THE CIA....AT THE CIA BUILDING???
Because the CIA has endless surveillance resources, they set up cameras around the facility and pretty quickly caught one of the suspects on camera.
All told, the theft ring netted $3,314 in free snacks. They all confessed, were stripped of their badges, and fired by their respective contract employers.
The brightest minds in America...using their powers to steal some hot fries and Snickers bars. Whoops.